Self-responsibility may be the key to finding fulfilment and happiness as you navigate adulting.
As you may know, the demand of adulting can distort our view of our own power to impact our lives. However, the areas of self-responsibility featured below demonstrate how one can leverage ownership to change self and influence our environment.
While responsibility can feel like accountability for blame, consider that personal responsibilty provides opportunity to steer the ship in a world that leave so much outside of our control.
This post is all about the types of self-responsibility that do not focus on blame.
If you are anything like me you understand the eye roll and slight anxiety that comes with self-responsibility. You may be a perfectionist or overachiever. Your disposition is already skewed toward self-blame and accountability. You blame yourself for the things that have nothing to do with you. We are not taking that road today. We are going the scenic route uncovering the opportunities and relief that self-responsibility can bring as you pursue the best version of yourself.
Activity
Self-responsibility is taking ownership of the areas in your life that are within your control. I believe in the power of the written word, so, I am going to ask that you write down all the things that are within your control and all the things that are outside of your control.
To give you some ideas, check out this list of things that I made as an example.
| Within your Control | Outside your Control |
| Attitude | The way people perceive me |
| What I say | My emotions |
| What I dwell on | The future |
| My Diet | The Past |
| How I spend my time | How others behave |
| How I treat others | How others feel |
| How I care for myself | The economy |
| Opportunities I take or decline | Your family |
| The secrets I share/ to whom I share | Death |
This list may shrink or expand as you move through the various environments that make up your life. Just remember when a situation arises, to consider which of these things that concern me is within my control. When you determine what is not within your control it allows you to concentrate the power of focus on the things you have say so over, rather than exerting energy to change a situation you have no authority to change.
The Types 5 of Self-Responsibility
Self-Improvement
Let’s get this one out of the way. Are you consistently late to work? (raises hand slowly). I know, I am! If tardiness is your short coming and you no longer want to be tardy, due to lack of preparation or time management, you have the power to change that! What a blessing! You are not bound by your habits. You get to change the area of your life that you want to change without input from anyone else. Here’s another example: have you taken up a new hobby like sewing? The effort you exereted to develop that skill was in your control! You decided to concentrate your time and effort on developing the skill to sewl.
You have the power to determine how you want to improve yourself. That is within your control and therefore you are responsible to make the improvements or not. By deciding to take ownership of your self-improvement journey you can curate the skills, habits, and routines you incorporate in your life to bolster the aspects of yourself that you want to enhance. Check out our goal setting activity book to start your journey to making and implementing your goals.
{Related Post: 7 Steps to Achieve What you Want in Life}
Self-Determination
This is another fun one! The ability to preserver. While the desire to press on can be heavily influenced by external winds the ultimate decision lies within. If you want to learn to bake brownies, and you don’t succeed the first time you can choose to try it again. If you want to take a trip to the Motherland you can wield your internal forces to save, plan, and execute the trip.
You decide what to pursue and how relentlessly or not to pursue it. You determine the amount of effort and energy you give to what is before you. Your determination is within your control and therefore your responsibility to decide.
Self-Advocacy
This little piggy in my experience is the most neglected type of personal responsibility. The focus on blame casting toward oneself is steady in pieces written about self-responsibility (no shade). When you are responsible for another human being, a part of your duty is to care for, protect, and provide for that individual. Do we put effort into ensuring our own safety, providence, and care? I have had several conversations with others regarding their care for themselves in the workplace. While I understand the challenge of navigating the workplace socially and positionally, it is important that you take responsibility for advocating for yourself when you need to. Standing up for yourself with friends, family, co-workers, in the doctor’s office, at a restaurant is apart of self-responsibilty. I like to say, that I am responsible to myself.
Ensuring that I am treated fairly and with respect is a non-negotiable. I deserve dignity, so I advocate for myself like I would my friend or sister.
Self-Value
Another important type of personal responsibility is self-worth. Society often asigns value to people based on a myriad of qualities that we may or maynot possess. For the intelligent, wealthy, creative, connected, and beautiful prestige in certain groups is available. In different parts of the world or your social sphere you may be able to replace these qualities with other aspects that people value. Weather you fit into these categories or not, it is your responsibility to value yourself. Society is everchanging and how value is assigned can change by the post of a picture. When you value yourself and find worthiness inherently the tide can change but you are anchored.
I find my intrinsic worthiness in my faith. As a believer in Jesus Christ, we are taught that Jesus died for humanity and the life of God was paid for our salvation. Since, I believe that the creator of the universe sees me as worthy enough to trade His life for, I know that I am special simply because I am.
Self-Care
The buzz word everyone is fawning over, and rightfully so. Self-care for any responsible adult is an obligation. Ensuring that you are well is on of the most paramount of your responsibilities to yourself. Things like regular physician visits, eating well, proper gromming, and emotional health are ways to demonstrate personal responsibility.
I have encountered people that often share how they have gone long stretches of time without going to see a physician to check on their healthy while enjoying the privelage of health care. I understand that health care is not accessible to everyone (that is a problem we must address as a society), however, if you are a part of the group that does, use it. It is your responsibility tend to your wellness.
Importance of Self-Responsibility
When we decide to show-up for ourselves in the ways mentioned above the inevitable result is not blame but love. Self-responsibility is an the opportunity to do good to and for one’s self. Doing good to and for yourself is not always easy and comfortable, however, framing your thinking and approach to self-responsibility as an opportunity allows you to embrace it and when you embrace it the truth of oneself and the power you carry are bear and available to explore. Leaning into self-respobsibility begets clarity and vulnerability with self and I believe that is the catalyst of true self discovery and achievement.
